Montesorta

So when I woke up today, Goomba was here and she doesn't put me back to bed when I wake up too early, because Goompa was raised on a farm and there's no such thing as too early. I snuggled in her room for awhile before heading downstairs for breakfast and a fun-filled morning. It was so early, that by the time everybody else came downstairs, I was done sitting in my high chair and it was time to set about my daily routine.

Lately I have found immense pleasure in taking inventory. Let it never be said that I take my possessions for granted. I've seen other baybee's houses and they don't seem to have as many toys as I do, but that may be just because they don't know how to properly take inventory as I do. Below are the steps of a proper inventory.

Inventory, and so can you!

1. Obtain something to write on, be it a crayon and pad, a Magna Doodle, an Etch A Sketch or pasta sauce and some white wall board.
2. Select categories with which to sort items before counting, such as Good for throwing, Good for hitting people with, Good for wrapping around neck, Good for carrying around like a purse or satchel and Cars.
3. Take out items in each category and count them. Pacing is a personal preference, but be mindful of the indirect relationship between speed and accuracy.

It is important to note that steps 1 and 2 are completely optional, as is the need to count.

Once the contents of all containers are on the floor in the widest area of the given room, your job is done. Now you know exactly how much stuff you have. The other day Dadda took me upstairs for a nap and forgot to give me my Babba. Not only that, but he had the nerve to tell me that a sippy cup filled with milk was the same thing. Well, you know how it is with a new skill, you need to practice it as often as possible to get it right. I quietly and quickly took inventory of my room and determined that Bubbas have a lot of clothes in their dresser and that none of their socks fit me. Not one single sock!

I am an affectionate little boy. When asked for a kiss I oblige by placing my face close to the intended recipient and allowing them to kiss me. When someone crouches low to my level and opens their arms wide for a hug, I run and tackle them or proceed to scale their frame until they buckle under my weight and I can wrestle them and empty their pockets. Now my embraces have come under criticism lately. That is why I have taken it upon myself to practice giving hugs. Last time Dadda took me on a walk, I hugged every short red metal hugging practice dummy we saw. These are weird harmless things on just about every street corner in our neighborhood.

Hugging Practice Dummy

Although I think my practice hugs went swimmingly, Dadda grimaced each time and thoroughly washed my hands and clothes when we got home. Also while we were on this walk, Dadda fussed at me for trying to experience nature. Often I like to stop and examine things closely. Dadda likes to make shadow puppets appear and make them eat things off of the ground. That's simply not fair, shadows have weak digestions and should only eat a low-fat high fiber shadow diet. I tried to eat an acorn instead and Dadda slapped it out of my hand. Jeez, if he wanted it so bad he should've found his own acorn.


Today I am maniacal, a handful!